Category Archives: Photography

Longing for yesterday (free verse ) August 1 2020

Every once in a while,
she weeps of what was
and what is today.

The first few months,
She’d cry a little each day;
listening to tallies of the dead
…press conferences
Oh how she would dread!

the stats always on the rise
her home became her prison
of hope and despair

in time she’d try to manage
those blubbering crying spells
two, three or four times a week…
just a little overflow…
you know when you’re embracing life
and then you catch yourself
realizing life’s not so typical
you don’t know when it ever will be.

Every once in a while,
she weeps of what was
and what is today.

And those times
you think of your children
and grandchildren
and your wish has been
only for their happiness
no parent wants to see their children sad,
worried what the future may bring
you want them happy and hopeful
you want them to look forward
to newborns and christenings
to graduations and weddings
yes, those are things that make her weep
knowing their fears are also hers
she can’t remove, they’re theirs to keep

every once in a while,
she weeps of what was
and what is today.

today she had a few errands
the drug store,
the post office had a package
And then to her local grocer
so pleased was she
proud of her deeds
walking with her checkered cart
under midday sunny skies

Every once in a while,
she weeps of what was
and what is today.

And then she arrives
this new reality
slaps her in the face
washing, disinfecting,
wiping down every item
that was touched by others
you know… just in case

washing her favourite mask
cash back credit card
proof of ID health card
and all three condo keys

she’d looked so forward
to sit, enjoy those fresh fruits
a slice or two or maybe three
of fresh baked crusty bread
filled with berries and oranges,
and add some whipped cream cheese
and cold glass of cranberry juice

But the washing, the separating,
the storing and disinfecting
takes at least an hour or so

at last she does sit down
looks out at her balcony
flowers on her mom’s iron table
her tree she now calls her own
she weeps, of what seems so normal
yet, Is still not so
one still does not know
whenever that will be.

(c) tournesol ‘ 2020/08/01

 

Image may contain: sky, night and outdoor, text that says "how can one weep up above the dark blue sky heavens speak (C) tournesol'20"

an afterthought

how can one weep
up above the dark blue sky
heavens speak

smiling sky (haibun) daily moments July 30 2020

(c) Clr ‘2020/7/30

 

C R A C K!    B O O M!
Heart does a summersault
Heavens aglow

It was hard to settle the heart and she could not help but wonder, looking out at the dark grey sky how do people survive each day, who face darkness and sounds of gunfire and explosions? How naïve she feels…how blessed in her ignorance.

Peaceful day
One must count
Each blessing

One, two, three layers
Forming a halo
of colours

After an hour of thunder and rain, she steps out to see the sky smile at her

Semi circle
Painting the sky
with hope

© tournesol ‘2020/07/30

A blessed day – Day 119 – daily moments July 10/20

She woke up feeling so pumped from her morning’s reveries.  And then she checked her email and social network and  her heart felt so warm and fuzzy from wonderful comments from friends and colleagues celebrating her twenty year anniversary at her workplace.

sweet voice echoes
igniting spirits like fire
Mother spoke to her
joining friends and colleagues
thanking her for services

and yet,
feels like thanking them
to do what she loves

Day 119 and we are still living in this heatwave…35C but feels like 40C. Opening the patio door she wanted to step out and admire the flowers on her balcony…no, not today, she sighed and quickly slid the door shut to keep the cool air inside. Feeling bless she could sit in her living room or cook in her kitchen and still admire the beauty on the other side of the glass.

(c) Clr ‘7/10/2020

heart fills with love
looking fondly at such beauty
a gift from you

© Tournesol ‘2020/07/10

Daily Moments July 10, 2020

Day 62 – budding promise ~May 15 2020 (haibun)

I remember as a first time mom how much I questioned  so much about the health and safety of our son. His first fall, I held him in my arms and cried with him…and cried some more even after he had stopped, whispering over and over, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry”.

Parents in general are very proud of their children and some also like to boast…”Oh, he said his first word at “blank”…or “Oh, your son still doesn’t have teeth? Mine has five already.” Most times, you try to shrug it off but once you get home you take out Dr. Spock or any other paediatric bible you have for reassurance.

I remember our paediatrician, who was a teacher at McGill and the Head of paediatrics at the Jewish General Hospital would take phone calls from worried moms every morning from 7:30 am to 8:00am.  What a godsend!  Once he replied to my question that our son’s  teeth would be stronger if they come in later. Hmm, well, that reassured me. I tried not to boast too much  except with my mom, of course.  As a nana though I don’t hold back…grandparents have brag rights…it is WRITTEN…somewhere…:)

Today, it is May 15th and the lawns and landscapes are still quite bare.   At least it is not snowing but it would be so nice to start having some greenery on those trees. I am not even asking for flowers…just leaves! But I must have patience and embrace the tiny signs of growth…

(c) Clr 2020/05/15

limbs in wait
blossoms spreading slowly
budding promise
late bloomers growing stronger
bringing hope to the world

© Tournesol ‘2020/05/15

Day 40 -Earth Day Haibun April 22, 2020

 

Last day of my three day work week and not  too soon.  Struggling to sleep at night when the rest of the building seems to sleep  late…a neighbour that walks with heavy feet anytime from midnight to three in the  morning makes for a short night.  I am sure she does not realize this and since I am a new owner here, I have not had a chance to meet anyone except for the owner downstairs, who I have told to bang on the ceiling anytime if I am too noisy or the music or tele is too loud.

I am such a light sleeper  so even if I go to bed at 8 or 9 which I did last night, I woke up with a start  at midnight and struggled to get back to sleep hours later. Ear plugs do not seem to muffle the vibration of a person banging a closet door or plodding . I’ve chosen to sleep with my earbuds listening to  music with the volume low and yet…

rubber limbs
floating on an astral plane
snapping back
rumbling clouds shudder
from the third floor

Snow greeted me this morning on my patio as a mid-spring scenery.

Earth Day
bicentennial
snow on our lawns
so much for Mother Earth
giving us the finger

I took a nice bubble bath before my shift and watched a few short videos celebrating Earth Day.

The morning was not too bad but during lunch, I couldn’t help but check on the news to hear updates and that can get me nervous and frustrated. Lately, I notice a bubbling impatience inside my chest. Our province is still rising…over half of the country’s stats. How can you ever get used to hearing about deaths? Two friends told me this week they lost a relative…reality sucks! Whether it is 1 or 100 (which is nothing compared to Europe, I know and I can only imagine how scary it must be too…but still a life multiplied by xxxx is always too much.

My calls were more frenzied in the afternoon and it took a lot for me to concentrate…trying to ignore the simmering storm.

sadness and angst
listening to their suffering
pulses rising
muted implosions
licking salty lips

© Tournesol ‘2020/04/22

Day 40 and Earth Day (daily moments)